Surviving
I feel trap. Trap by emotions. I want out. How do I do it? How do I make it happen? I smile and I laugh. But somehow all that smiling and smiling juz disappear becoz of one lousy thought. My world crashes again around me. I get depress. I feel like I am drowning. I feel lost. I feel empty. Nonetheless I always manage to pull myself back up. For awhile. Long enuf for the smiles and laughter to take over. For the wall to built in my mind again. To face the battle that is on-going in my head. Can I keep this up? How long will I stay sane? Will I give up?I hope not. Coz my brains know it is not worth it despite my heart yelling...he is all IT...
posted by Jujubie at 9:27 AM
2 Comments:
Jujubie ;_;
Greetings from the spy.
I'm not the kind of person that likes to get into other people's business, but if you ask me... I think what you should do is follow what your heart tells you. It's looks like it's becoming too much from beyond the point of depression. I honestly hate to see you lead a destructive path over this. It really isn't okay to keep this going if it isn't going anywhere. It's a waste of your time so you got to do what you got to do and get it over with. Tell the guy how you really feel through all out honesty and don't bullshit it half-way, quarter way, or whatever way. If you really love the dude, you got to gamble by putting him on the spot and confess the hell out to him. If he still takes it as a joke and isn't serious at all about it, leave the bitch to the curb. You deserve better.
Take care of yourself and don't let this ruin whatever remaining years you got left. It'll make you old fast. Don't worry, I have a feeling you'll pull through out of this just fine.
PS: I'm on vacation and the damn IRCs don't work here in this internet cafe for some reason. Probably a firewall or something. Or maybe I have a lack of knowledge of how computers work.
Anyways I hope you can resolve this problem. The sooner the better I'm telling you. Much love to ya and to the rest of the guys that know me in the intranets.
Wow...I didnt realise tt there was a comment to this entry...a comment that is very well written and well said...thank you very much for the encouragement and advice...
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