10 Taboo Words

I have abnormal, noisy, nosey, irritating friends.....they may aaaaaallllll deny this in the comments later but trust me! Take it from someone with first hand experience....they ARE! In the event you have the opportunity to meet these darlings of mine...do not verbalise the following things:

1. Bite me - Well my friends especialy erm the Dark Queen, they are very LITERAL...saying this phrase will result in you either screaming in pain becoz there is a sudden sharp pain on ur arm OR if your reflexes are fast...you end up playing 'stay away from me' around a table or anything that resembles one. They will really bite you...SERIOUS I am not kidding!
2. Fats - Argh! This word will cause u a whole load of confusion coz the moment you say this my friends erm especially the bumbling village idiot and erm once again the Dark queen...will begin blabbering about how FAT they have gotten and as you listen you can see them pointing at parts of their body to show their apparent fatness but trust me when I say not to bother to ponder on it toooooo much lah coz you DIE also you can't figure out or see where the fats are because they are NOT fat to begin with!
3. Boobs - For this word you will receive two extremes...one fren ...Massie..will go on and on about how her boobs are non existent. This will be accompanied by various nonsensical plans on how she intent to make her boobs look bigger! (This woman really has a wild imagination...at times they are even CREATIVE!!!). On the extreme end, alamak once again the Dark Queen, will go on and on about how her boobs are too big SOMETIMES (I highlight the sometimes because I find it amazing how she thinks her boobs shrinks and expand...cud it be caused by the freaking weather!???).
4. Cold - 90% of the time their reply to you wud be ....'Do you need a hug?" followed by them moving very quickly towards you with their arms wide open! I dun get it though like seriously they are so skinny ...no fats... how the toot are you gonna help the person warm up ... ok ok clean thoughts ppl!
5. Chak - This is juz a trigger to more chak chaks from them...on a good day it can be, cud be, maybe, a little bit, tini wini CUTE...but on days when you need fast responses DO NOT I mean DO NOT say the word in any circumstances.
6. Elite - Especially in the presence of Suzanne ...DON'T! I will personally smack you on your freaking head. My friends they are in denial...they think they are balanced bilinguals..in English (Ya I admit they are superb in this language) and Malay (erm erm...ever watch the children's programme on suria called Krayon???!!) and therefore they think they are elites! However SUZANNE apparently thinks she is also good at ARAB which makes her a TRI-elite!
7. Awak-Kita - To the gerls its fine but to Elise aka Kimmie you will see his face screws up and hear him saying "Argh Lets not speak Malay ah" (In a begging tone) becoz then the gerls will start speaking Krayon Malay and it is highly irritating for him! Haahhahaha!
8. Jerk - There are 5 gerls 1 guy in my circle of NIE frens ...this word will trigger a lot of man bashing...is it our fault that men are such a pain most of the time? Hur! Hur! Hur! Oh dun worry abt Elise lah he has learnt to manage the matter he juz agrees and piss us of to silence...
9. Hungry - Nagging session will begin to each other ...accusations on how the other keep saying that she is hungry but never really eat anything when she has her food infront of her....the pot calling the kettle black is sooooooooooooo applicable here!
10. Tired - Unless you see a coffee place nearby dun mention this please... you will hear tons of complains, whining, blah blah yadda yadda..."are we there yet", "oi I thought you say its close!", "Pain, Pain, Pain", "My leg hurts", "My bag getting heavier!!!"

Thank god they are lovable if not I wud have personally kill them!